Features Of The Apple Car via The Onion

Typical piece from The Onion, not to be taken seriously at all. So here are my top five new features.

  • Full vertical integration with Apple Gasoline
  • Sleek, unobtrusive airbags
  • Windshield features four times as many pixels as reality
  • Compatible with most major roads
  • Comes with couple of cool Apple stickers

In other news news this Apple Car rumor has been getting far too much press lately to be ignored.

via Features Of The Apple Car | The Onion – America’s Finest News Source.

XKCDs Alternate Universe What Ifs

I always love reading XKCD’s What If… piece every week and by far this is my favourite part of this week’s Alternate Universe What Ifs. The ones in bold being particularly appealing to my sick sense of humour.

According to a report by the Occupational Safety & Health Administration, the top ten leading causes of injury in the workplace are as follows:

  • • Lightning strikes

  • Unknown

  • • Predation

  • • Betrayal

  • Curses (ancient + modern)

  • • Ant bites

  • • Falling

  • • Spider bites

  • Bites (other)

  • • Natural causes

Velominati on The Hail Mary Shift

Maybe, in a few years, when we are all forced into electronic shifting, a soothing voice will emanate from the lever. “Really? You want an even easier gear? You don’t have one so get your fat ass off the saddle, get in the drops before I auto-shift you into the big chainring and leave you there. And you call yourself a Cyclist.

via Velominati › The Hail Mary Shift.

One the most recent reminders as to why I still read the Velominati blog. No reason to TL;DR here, there is always a payoff. Thanks Frank & Gianni

Tipping and The A-Game

Leaving a pleasant note of encouragement or a decent tip may be enough to turn their day around.

No way, leave a loonie or a penny and there is no mistaking that they need to pick up their game. However if you work in the service industry and don’t bring your A-game then you deserve to be reminded in the wallet. I don’t know of any other jobs apart from civil service where you can be rewarded for not actually doing a good job.

I know it’s a hard stance but just think about the number of times you have been chewed out for missing a deadline or not catching the error before it went  out. If your daily motivation is being patted on the back by strangers who think they know you then you need to re-evaluate what your doing and why you are still doing it.

via How Much to Tip for Good and Bad Service, According to an Ex-Waitress.

$20M for West Island Trains … in 2 Years… Maybe

The idea is to reduce delays and allow the AMT to add six more trains per day to the Vaudreuil-Hudson line when the work is complete in a few years.

But it’s only a temporary fix and what the West Island really needs is a who new set of tracks splitting the narrow burrow even further. Expect to see green space along the powerlines north of the 40 come up in the plans and then get swiftly kicked out again.

via $20M for West Island train improvements – Montreal – CBC News.